ACORN DEVASTATED!
Because It Transformed Into a Tree!
In Related Headlines
Caterpillar Hates Being A Butterfly
“I never saw it coming,” Acorn declared according to reliable sources.
“I didn’t ask for this,” Caterpillar, who will be leading a symposium on how to halt the sands of time, is quoted as saying.
A flurry of lawsuits and protests are rising up across the country to support efforts to stop evolution with the slogan: Keep Things They Way They Are.
“What’s the big deal with trees anyhow?” is the question put to the reliable source by Acorn.
Added Caterpillar, “Anyway, who even likes butterflies?”
In Other Related Headlines
Kittens Demand to Stay Little and Cuddly Because Cats Are Annoying
There is growing fear that now puppies and ponies may get in on the action. If that occurs, experts say a revolution to stunt the growth of all living things is inevitable. Authorities warn that if babies find out that they are way cuter than teenagers, they easily could be convinced to join this rebellion. Should that happen, all hope is gone.
On a positive note…there would never again be shame attached to wearing a diaper.