Eventually he would become a Deacon in the Catholic Church, a stalwart influence in the personal and religious lives of his parishioners. Though on this day in the 1970s he was just our friend laughing about the 14 year old girl around the corner who had been impregnated by her father. I didn’t react. I was stone-cold frozen on a barren landscape I had no name for.
That little girl lives in my memory as a sentence stamped into the heat of a summer afternoon, captured in time as a string of detached, curious words devoid of meaning, of flesh and blood trauma, but still bearing the stench of unadulterated, forlorn catastrophe. A rape pregnancy cemented over in my own past still had decades of damage to inflict, years of psychological torment to wreak before I would be forced to return to the entrenched, crushing details of the violent sexual and emotional punishment exacted on me by adult males and the destruction left reeking in its wake.
There is a reality that permeates our existence: we are much more than the sum of our physical parts. Evolution is the reason we are here. We are present at this moment in time, in this place, at our current level of consciousness tasked with expanding our awareness and to purposefully continue our evolution into the light of profound knowledge and new, heightened understanding.
Deep within us is a calling, an unrest, an urge toward something we may not be able to identify. This nagging unrest manifests in many ways, including irrational fear, depression, anger, hopelessness, aggression, physical illness, the fanatical compulsion to dominate others physically, emotionally, ideologically, or according to a religious doctrine. The yearning of the soul to be heard, to heal from wounds inflicted, to advance into fuller understanding and new discoveries is an urge so fundamental, so strong, so true to its purpose of growth that the spirit within will not relent until that objective is achieved.
Free will is vital to our evolution. It is the energetic path to incorporating what we are here to learn. What we are to learn is deeply embedded in our forever self. Our primary challenge is to develop our inner core which we do by experience. No one…no one…knows what is right or true for another. To presume such authority is destructive. Imposing one’s will (personal, institutional, governmental, or theological) on another breaches physical, emotional, and spiritual boundaries and shoves negative energy into that person’s forever self, forcibly wrenching them off the path they are here to follow so they may achieve their highest good. Many who are positive continue to be destroyed by the negative energy employed by others.
Each of us will experience failure, illness, grief, disappointments, missteps, etc. Within those natural, energetic life challenges lie valuable, pertinent—and difficult—lessons we can mine for truths that will assist our internal growth immensely. By purposefully resolving the shadows left by the chaos provoked by difficulties and obstacles, you are honoring yourself physically and spiritually, and intentionally accessing the energetic light of your deeply personal forever self. These measured, slow steps toward resolution of what hides in the shadows are the process necessary to achieve emotional and spiritual freedom. With emotional and spiritual freedom comes the courage and ability to be your fullest self, to live thoroughly in your truth and with sincere purpose—truth and purpose that is indispensable to others struggling along a similar path.
If you are to uncover your own authentic light and move forward along the superior path of profound understanding, compassion and true humanitarianism, it is imperative that you retain all personal, spiritual, and bodily rights and enforce those boundaries with confidence and strength. By honoring the integrity of your soul and your soul’s deepest mysteries, you are also honoring the integrity of all souls and valuing and supporting their individual, mysterious journeys.
Women suffering a biological crisis will not be condemned and abandoned. Should Roe v Wade be overturned and the ability for a woman to make herself whole is criminalized, safe, compassionate caregivers will rise up and reach out to women and girls in dire need of holistic medical attention and loving support. By aligning themselves with the energies of harmony and integrity, these nurturers, caretakers, and protectors will be soul lights illuminating the way for women lost in a biological darkness.
Abortion was not available to me when I so desperately needed one. It was not available to the young girl impregnated by her father either. The stalwart Deacon will continue his fight to ensure that safe, legal abortions are never, ever available to any girl or woman regardless...
And I know him—he is smiling.